Choices

“I Choose You”
Let the bough break, let it come down crashing

Let the sun fade out to a dark sky

I can’t say I’d even notice it was absent

Cause I could live by the light in your eyes
I’ll unfold before you

What I’ve strung together

The very first words

Of a lifelong love letter
Tell the world that we finally got it all right

I choose you

I will become yours and you will become mine

I choose you

I choose you

(Yeah)
There was a time when I would have believed them

If they told me you could not come true

Just love’s illusion

But then you found me and everything changed

And I believe in something again
My whole heart

Will be yours forever

This is a beautiful start

To a lifelong love letter
Tell the world that we finally got it all right

I choose you

I will become yours and you will become mine

I choose you

I choose you
We are not perfect

We’ll learn from our mistakes

And as long as it takes

I will prove my love to you
I am not scared of the elements

I am under-prepared, but I am willing

And even better

I get to be the other half of you
Tell the world that we finally got it all right

I choose you

Yeah

I will become yours and you will become mine

I choose you

I choose you

I choose you

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I’ve Moved…..

So as I promised… I am back.  I am bigger, better and stronger. Thank you for staying with me and waiting out the drought.

 

My new blog is righthereinthepassengerseat.wordpress.com

See you there!!!

Coming soon…….

Yes, I am back! After much thought, I have decided no more incognito for me. It is my right to share my thoughts, feelings and stories. I have missed blogging, but I felt judged and criticized. I now feel loved and supported and it is time to get back on the horse!…..more tonight!  Thank you for not giving up on me!

Desperately Seeking Happiness

Are you happy? Are you truly happy?  What makes you happy? What makes you unhappy?  How much time do you spend being truly happy vs trying to be truly happy vs trying not to be unhappy?

First, I realized I wasn’t happy; was I unhappy? Maybe.  Then I tried to be truly happy. You know the old adage, ” fake it til you make it”-maybe this will make me truly happy. Didn’t work.  Maybe I need to change myself.  Maybe if I do this or change this thought or expectation, I will be happy. Maybe if I act happy I will be happy.Maybe if I pretend this doesn’t bother me, it won’t bother me and I will be happy.  Maybe I’m not meant to be truly happy.

Have you ever had these conversations with yourself?  Everyone deserves to be truly happy.  Everyone deserves to be truly happy without changing who they are, what they do or what they believe.  Sometimes it just takes a little change to make you truly happy.  Other times it takes a BOLD change to find happiness.  Sometimes this BOLD change affects a lot of other people’s happiness.  You are only responsible for your own happiness-so don’t let this sway you.

Please make sure you are happy.

Aside

“Everyone wants to be the sun that lights up your life. But I’d rather be your moon, so I can shine on you during your darkest hour when your sun isn’t around.”

Anonymous

I just stumbled upon this quote and I love it

“Everyone wants to be the sun…

Women and Crying

What is it about us women that makes us cry so dang easy?I’m  Happy (tears), Sad (tears), Mad (tears), Fear (tears), Trusting (tears), anticipation (tears), Surprise (tears).  I always said I was not going to be one of those “cry babies”-but, Yep! I sure am! 

I read a great book last week and sobbed hysterically through the whole dang thing! Did I put it down and say,” To hell with this book!” Nope, kept on reading and kept on crying….all the way til the end.

I remember when Michael and Tyler were babies, heck-when Camryn was an infant (my niece-not even my own infant) I could look in their eyes and just cry. Why was I crying? In amazement, in awe? I don’t know I just did.

Say something sweet to me-I cry. Say something mean to me-I cry. Crap-just scream something sweet at me and I’ll still cry.

I don’t know why. Tell me a sappy love story and I’ll cry. Tell me a crappy love story and I’ll still cry.  Tell me a stupid story that has no love in it and I probably will still cry.

Get mad at me and scream-I cry! Make me feel worthless and like a piece of shit and I will cry! Piss me off to no end and I will still cry-its my answer to everything!

Fish in the Sea

We’ve all heard the old adage, “There’s plenty of fish in the sea”.  And while for the most part it is true; yes, there are plenty of fish in the sea-that is, if you count the crazies, the criminal, the obsessive, the philanderer, the converters, the sacrificers, the exotics, the too young, too old, the rebellious, the abusers.  The list can go on and on and on. Do we really want to go deep-sea fishing only to come up with a net full of  fish to be “thrown back” and to be sea-sick puking off the side of the ship?

Currently in the good ‘Ole U. S of A the current breakup rate of first marriages is 41-50%, the rate after second marriage is from 60-67% and the rate for the third marriage is 73-74%. Pretty depressing, even I the most “Happily ever after person” in the world will admit.  But as I have always said, if you kiss enough frogs, surely one will turn in to a prince, right?

So, don’t give up! “Just keep swimming, just keep swimming…what should we do, we swim some more!”  I do believe that there is someone out there for everyone.  I do believe in more than one loves of a lifetime, and I do believe that everyone should find a “happily ever after”.  Even if it takes thirty years to find that special fish-in the end wouldn’t five minutes with your dream fish in the end all be worth it?

 

Quotes from Parents

If you are reading this, it is pretty safe to assume that you had parents (at least of some sort and in some sort) If you are anything like me, you probably swore to prove them and their quotes wrong! Growing up with four older brothers and a younger sister and multiple animals-it seems we were always being warned about something.

“Don’t play with that, you’ll poke somebody’s eye out!”-guess what, Mom-no one’s eye got poked out!! And only once did I see a guy with a patch over his eye with a shirt on that said,”Mom was right! I poked out my own eye!”

“Finish your supper, there are starving kids in Africa” The only thing that comes to mind is why does my full stomach make them less hungry. I even replied one time, “Let’s box it up and mail it to them!” I spent many nights alone long after dinner looking at my cold plate of food or waiting for the milk in my glass to disappear.

“Do you think money grows on trees?” I didn’t and still don’t care where the money comes from as long as I have it, I am happy!!

“You keep making those faces, your face is going to freeze that way!” Hehe. Can you imagine what life would be like today if children’s faces really froze in all the various faces made!! We might all feel alot better about ourselves!

“If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” I think the entire world and Facebook population is still trying to learn this one!

“Do you think you were born in a barn?” I don’t actually remember where I was born or what the place looked like, I can only go by what you told me….so, maybe I was?

and of course, “I’ll give you something to cry about!” Depends, are you going to tell me something really sad, or hurt me?

….and my Dad’s all time favorite,”Do you need a hook in your a$$?” in regards to leaving the door open-it only took until I was 33 years old to figure out that the hook was to close the door after you walked out! LOL

 

What is Sensory Processing Disorder?

What is Sensory Processing Disorder?.

So this is a link to one of my first posts. Michael my six year old has Sensory Processing Disorder. He is doing fantastic, and we are no longer seeing Molly our Occupational Therapist at Children’s every week-we miss her and I would love to set her up with a new single friend of mine.  But I will just sit back and leave “My Matchmaker” hat on the shelf for the time being! LOL

Anyway, Michael finished the school year doing great! He did need his weighted blanket at school for the last two weeks of school to help keep his focus and he is still sleeping through the night with it.  He even requests it if I forget to cover him with it-which is great!!

We still do alot of “heavy work” when his body is feeling overly excited or overly sluggish-but with it being summer and him riding bike, playing baseball and jumping on the trampoline he is getting lots of exercise and input in daily.

I recently found an old friend, and he thinks there is something going on with his child, he was worried it was the A-word. Yeah, Autism and so he didn’t want to get him evaluated. However, after talking about Michael, he feels pretty confident that the same thing is going on with his five year old.  I think I have him convinced to at least have him evaluated. Sometimes knowing is half the battle!!

Life in General

Wow! Can’t believe how long it has been since I have written a blog!!! I’ve been very busy…obviously!

So, we are trying to sell our house, surpised?! Yes, me too! We never even talked about it and then the house 500 feet from us-that is “in the country” (aka not in our subdivision) and really, seriously in the country!! Like well water, it’s own septic system and acres!! Yes, as in more than one!!! Hehe!! So we put our house on the market a month ago.

A house, is just that….a house!  All the memories we created here-still in my brain. Yes, it is our first home, where both our children have been raised (thus far). It was brand new when we bought it-already built and ready to move in! A spec home, so nothing fancy. But I have decorated and painted, and then repainted and then painted again. I have moved furniture (by myself) at least twenty million times! My husband quit helping about 19,999,999 times ago. I may be little, but I am MIGHTY!

Michael and I planted (or buried) the St. Joseph statue a couple of weeks ago. He has doubts that it will help sell our home since it wasn’t the real guy!  Tyler and I dug him up (the statue, that is) washed him, invited him to dinner one night and then reburied him in a different spot.  Tyler thinks he might be holding a pancacke in his hand-which of course he thinks is cool, because he loves pancakes! I think it may have just been a tool or something, but whatever.

I am working a ton of extra shifts-why I don’t know. I guess because Jeff is out of school for the summer and I need an excuse to go hide in my office.  The extra money will be nice, though it will go to help pay for the next house we move to which may or may not be the one next door.  I can’t even get Jeff to look at other houses right now.

So we have been in the ER once since we last spoke, should have been twice but I found some steri strips and bandaged one wound back together myself and I have to say it looks pretty good! Michael ran into a rebar pipe and needed seven stitches in his leg, but we survived that-even with his SPD, we brought the weighted blanket along and he handled it terrifically!

We have been doing a lot of fishing since Jeff has been out of school. Its fun and it reminds me of being on the farm and dragging my sister fishing against her will. We have caught quite a bit of fish and are hoping to have a fish fry when we do evenutally move.

Jeff is interviewing for a principal job in his current school district and is pretty excited. I hope he gets it.  Not that much will change, except that he will give up coaching highschool volleyball, the checks will be slightly larger, but not enough to support my credit card fascination!! LOL

Anyway, my creative ebbs have stopped flowing currently. So just giving a quick life update. I have some ideas floating around in my head that I will put to screen later! Ta ta for now and thanks for following!!!